Category Archives: Jill Adler’s Personal Blog

To Infinite and Beyond! Sage as a One-Year-Old.

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I dreamt last night that I was at a Don Henley concert except that Don was the spitting image of Sam Elliott and sang more like Bruce Springsteen than a former Eagles. And there I was sitting on scaffolding, watching the action below when all of a sudden he’s standing behind me, singing. I’m creeped out, not psyched and all I want to do is get down from there. Concert’s over and I’m searching everywhere for Sage. She’s near the portal and the stairs. Running for them. She’s her actual age and all of sudden she’s found her legs, she can walk, or better, run. She’s not hearing or seeing me, she’s taken off running. Faster than one of those pigs in a greased pig event. I dive and catch her but she’s desperate to get away. And there are people everywhere getting in the way. I’m trying not to take it personally but she’s running away from me! I panic. When did she learn to run?! I awake. It’s just a dream. Whew.
Sage is still sleeping soundly in her room. She’s not walking. She’s not running. Not yet. But she sure likes to move around. I’m not sure what the Don Henley part has to do with anything but I do know how scared I am of Sage running around. When I put her on the bed, it’s like she’s break dancing. She must dig the softness of the mattress and sheets. On the floor, she scoots on one knee with the other foot flat on the ground to propel her. Soon, there’ll be no stopping her?
She stands on her own, briefly, then sits back down. But mostly she plays quietly with her toys happy to greet you and share her toys with you. Walking may not be too far off and I’m not sure what to do at that point. Let her run up and down the hall? My books seem surprisingly vague about what to do with your newly mobile child beyond childproofing the house. How much time is minimally acceptable to spend playing during the day when you have work to do? Obviously supervision is key but does that mean I must leave the house every day for a romp in the park? Is every other day or three times a week acceptable? What should a one year old’s ‘normal’ day look like? And what about eating? How much is normal when it’s real people food? I’m used to the jars 2-3 a day. With eggs or spaghetti or bread, I can’t tell if she’s full or just doesn’t like her food after a few bites. And my pede told me I should start weaning her from her bottle – at least start by cutting out one a day and giving her milk in a (sippy) cup. I try but she just skips her milk altogether until it’s back in the bottle. I should be tougher but in the back of my head, the pede’s words that I “really shouldn’t worry about it until 15 months echo.” The good news is that she doesn’t need her nighttime bottle anymore. Water works fine. It’s time for more recon.
It’s been easy so far but Motherhood is rearing its ugly head and I have slim to no info about one-year-olds and how to be with them.
Next Monday, I head to Lake Powell for a four-day river trip on the Grand. No, I am not taking the baby. Ryan will get to stay with her all by himself. A first for both of them! And my first time leaving her for more than a day since she was born. I’m just a 5-hour drive away if there’s an emergency but they should be just fine bonding without mommy there. Hell, they’ll probably love it. The way he makes her laugh when he reads to her or dances with her. It’s precious. Everyone should laugh like that at least once a day.
Oh well, the babe is sleeping soundly (as usual, or course 😉 ) and I need to made good use of the quiet night and get back to work. For recent pictures of Sage and our quick trip to Vegas last week go to http://picasaweb.google.com/mtnmedia/VegasBaby.
Hope all is well and if you have any advice, I’m all ears.

She’s on the Move!

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Beach baby! You can see more pics from our San Diego trip at http://picasaweb.google.com/mtnmedia/MoreSDPhotos?authkey=Yylk4EdvLI8

At 5:15 p.m. on July 26, 2007, Sage crawled to me! We really thought she’d be one of those babies who skipped the dogmarch and went straight for walking but nope.
There she was, playing with Ryan in her room, with me watching from the doorway, when she spun on her bum and bee-lined for me like a padding puppy. I opened my arms wides, called to her and gave her the biggest, warmest hug when she got to me. I almost cried. My little baby was no longer completely dependent on me for transportation. I can’t arrest the process. She’s growing up. Uh Oh! Can this spell disaster? She’s already fussing when I lay her on the changing table. Crying and squirming where she used to twirl the diaper cream tube and smile up at me as I wiped. She wants to sit up and play with the light switch.

It’s back to the books to find out what I need to do to keep her from feeling cooped up yet plan the day so I can still work. Up till now, I could sit her down at various “stations” where she would play alone, and gleefully, for 1-2 hours until it was time for a scene change. She’s still good at keeping herself entertained but I’d like her to be able to stretch her legs, or better, knees and arms too. 😉 However, what happens now that I have to keep an eye on her?

Today, I caught Sage sitting in Tenaya’s dog bed, swinging around the electric cord that she had just pulled from the wallplug. Yikes! I jumped down from the bed with a gasp, whisked her to another corner of my room where she could safely play with my pile of parenting magazines. Later, she tried to wrestle Tenaya’s bone from the dog’s mouth. Tenaya actually saw this as a game. as soon as she felt a tug, she’d let go of the bone, then Sage would hand it back to her. Good Doggy.

I gotta go. I’m on deadline for Salt Lake Magazine. They’ve asked me to be a regular contributer to their outdoors section. My first piece is due tomorrow! I interviewed for an editorial position there about two months ago but they aren’t ready to allow their employees to telecommute and I learned a long time ago that M-F, 9-6 in a cubicle, just isn’t in my genetic makeup. Wish it was; then Sage might actually have a college trust. Instead, she gets mommy 24/7. I’ll remind her of that when she’s 17 and begging for a new car!

Independence Day

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Wouldn’t it be ironic if Sage began crawling forward by Wednesday? She’s so close. As I stood by the edge of the bed, I watched her inch on her back- head first- toward the point of no return. One more skooch. I caught her just as she launched. She laughed. That baby loves a freefall. I can’t wait to take her on rollercoasters. I had initially planned to hit Disneyland when we roadtrip to Cali. this week but friends and family talked me down from that ledge. It’s hot and crowded in July, she won’t remember, blah blah blah. So instead, I’ll investigate LegoLand. That’s in between surf sessions.

The goal is to get up consistently on a board.

We found instructors from Craigslist to help. And my brother will also be in town (with my nieces) to add his two cents on surfing. Sage gets to meet her 2-year-old Cousin Tessa. In a sense, Sage already has since she’s wearing most of her clothes! I’m actually very excited for this trip. Normally I’m going somewhere every other week in the summer but I stayed grounded after Telluride in May just to amp up for this trip. One week in cool San Diego. Wahoo!

We start our roadtrip on Thursday. Turns out I found a 28-year-old guy off of Craigslist to join us and split gas. He calls himself a “traveler” and hitches from place to place, country to country. He was in Utah visiting his dad and now he wants to get back to California. Ryan’s afraid we’re going to be escorting an axe murderer. I think he’s just jealous. 😉 But just in case- if you don’t see a blog on here from San Diego, call the cops. the guy’s name is Destry and he’s traveling with a lab-size puppy.

Things are good with Ryan. We hit a rough patch two weeks ago where I considered professional help – for both of us. We just weren’t communicating but bickering all the time. It was sucking the energy out of the room and me. Ryan didn’t see this as a problem! He thought this was healthy debating. It was over stupid stuff like my driving (which is horrible and will always be), my lack of neatness (again, won’t change), how potential tenants won’t pay more a month just because you have a washer and dryer. Crap like that. He’ll make a comment, I’ll respond , he’ll retort, I’ll say. “This is a ridiculous conversation. Enough already.” And he doesn’t notice that it’s time to change the subject. He’ll go on and on trying to engage me.

The other day he said I should knock out my living room wall and put in big windows. I said, “Sure, as soon as you have the money for the project.” You would think that was the end of story. But no, he had to continue to direct and explain why my house would look better. He didn’t get that I agree with him; I’m just not going to do anything about it. Hence the need for communication advice. MEN. It gets terribly annoying. I love the house to myself- no tension, no conflict, no valuable time wasted on idiotic conversations about what I need to do differently. Now, some of you are thinking, sounds like he’s trying to change you. And you would be right. And anyone who knows me, knows that’s a very dangerous path to tread. But what I think is going on is not that he wants to change me in a literal sense but that he feels like he has no control and that I have it all – he’s in my house, I am Sage’s primary caregiver, what I say goes. So he tries to find control by trying to control me, when he’s really just trying to assert himself. I wish I was equipped to deal with the ego struggle and he’s got no skills for this sort of thing either. The words and tone come out all wrong. I’m sure we’ll fight over this blog and he’ll tell me to stop talking about him to the WWW, I’ll get pissed, then apologize, say I’m sorry for hurting his feelings and reedit the blog. Or I could just take this whole paragraph out now. hmmmm.

Naw. it feels good to vent and it’s not like there isn’t a single chick out there that can’t relate.
Ryan and I have been together more than four years. We’re destined to survive this kind of BS. He’s still a sweet guy who deserves more appreciation from me!

9 Months Old and a Summer O Fun

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I don’t write in my blog often enough. Time blips by faster than the paint chips from my nails. Sage is a healthy 20 pounds at 9 months old. She’s apparently as big as most people’s 2 year olds! She’s outgrown her newborn clothes and now wearing 12-18 month stuff (so if anyone needs some cute little baby girly things, speak up!). She’s not crawling and that’s my fault. How can you blame me? She’s so sweet sitting on my bed, playing quietly with her Whoozit and alphabet blocks. Not to mention that I’ve read babies who take longer to walk are more intelligent than their twinkle-toed counterparts. Did I tell you that Sage is learning to swim? Well, not really but she’s getting time in the water. She likes to grab her ankles like a breakdancer rather than do the backstroke when you hold her belly up to the sun but it makes everyone laugh and she smiles that stunning toothless grin. She blows raspberries on a regular basis so we’ve used that as a way to introduce blowing bubbles in the water and she’s perfected the underwater pass without choking or wailing. Of course, it would be too much to expect that she would kick in the water but perhaps by the end of the summer… It’s still early. I’d rather have her swim than crawl. It’s safer in these parts. Crawling amid my clutter is a recipe for disaster.
Instead, she gets time in the jumper and the exersaucer and has learned to scoot backwards on her back when she feels like a change of scenery. She talks up a storm, sleeps 10-12 hours a night (with naps during the day), sits for hours without getting fussy (just ask the PR team for Reno), claps and waves. We think she’s the cutest baby on Earth. But I know that’s hormonal or something. I hear the same from other mothers – “my baby could be on the cover of magazines”, then I look at their baby and think “uh, not.” But what can you really say? Disagree? I’m not shallow, every baby is beautiful. It’s an uncontaminated soul filled with inspiration, imagination and sparkling eyes and laughing heart. How can that be ‘ugly’? But on a strictly esthetic level, there are some definitely ugly babies out there. I look back at newborn photos of Sage and think, ugh, she was not cute. But my OB-GYN swears Sage was a beautiful newborn. OK, I’ll believe her.
Sage gets cuter by the day, though. I’m constantly mesmerized by her little hands and big blue eyes. (go to www.dropshots.com/pcskigal to see).
Enough baby gushing. It’s been a busy May. We all flew to Reno for their annual River Fest at the beginning of the month. I sooo wish we had a river like the Truckee running through downtown Salt Lake where they could establish a whitewater park and I could practice my Eskimo rolls. For Memorial Weekend, we roadtripped (8 hours) to Telluride, Colo. for the MountainFilm Festival. The antithesis of Sundance, this Fest was subdued, intellectual and inviting to locals. We had no trouble getting into the flicks that interested us. Be on the lookout for a Canadian documentary called Sharkwater. It’s a powerful plea to save the sharks the way we rallied to rescue whales and seals. It showed a soft side to those sharp-toothed creatures you would never believe.
I have to stay home for a while now to catch up and pack up. I begin construction in two months. Don Bloxom, a Park City designer, has some pretty impressive ways to spend the equity in my home. When it’s all done I will have a new mother-in-law apartment for the grandmas to have ‘space’, a giant clutter-free (I hope) office with soundbooth and a built-in play area for Sage, and the master bathroom I’ve been dreaming about since I first moved here. Though ten years ago I settled for a spacious walk-in closet with a window and a phonebooth sized bathroom with only a shower, I never gave up my fantasy of a jetted tub with a view of the Wasatch, and a “thunder room” to wall off Ryan’s, er, emissions. The closet becomes the bathroom, the bathroom, the closet. Voile!
I’ll need some extra income to pay off the loan so if you know anyone looking for female voice or acting talent, an editor or writer, send them my way. I’m off to bed. It’s quite late around here – my favorite time of day.

Sage at 20 pounds and 8 months!

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I have been a slacker once again. Sage just turned 8 months old- two weeks ago. The ski season is pretty much over so I don’t have any excuses left. Catching up? Prepping for my trip to San Diego? A slew of auditions? Sure that’s all happening but I went back to writing in my journal and I get lazy duplicating my tales. But it’s time when the emails all roll in asking how we’re doing.
Babies are in the air this spring. My friend Mark Maziarz and his wife Mary Beth just popped out a little girl named Daisy (haven’t seen her in person yet but because Mark is a professional photographer he’s already got a website with photos of her. My old college roommate just announced she has twins due in May. A boy and a girl. Congrats, Sara!! (I always thought I wanted twins but then when decided I only wanted one child because I still want my life to resemble my life I was glad to hear I was only having my sweety Sage.) And my friend Kim is 15 weeks along. I’m hoping she’ll have a girl. She’s got a 2 year old boy that will have big issues learning to share mommy and daddy. A girl might ease things a bit. Two kids is just a scary proposition for me. I really only want Sage. Plus, I got off easy with her. No telling what it would be like a second time around- fat, complicated pregnancy, colic, Damian? I do wonder that since Ryan comes from a ridiculously enormous fam (a lot of that has to do with his parents divorcing and both remarrying into other large families), he may start to long for his own kid.
I’m mobile with one. Today we’re hanging in San Diego. My how a few months make all the difference. My parents were so excited (me too) to see Sage. It’s been about five months and she has sprouted the most adorable personality- smiles, squeals, mellowness, bright eyes and alertness. She sits unassisted, reaching for toys, holding her own bottle, eating baby food, rolling over, saying bababa, and playing peekaboo. My mom and dad are having so much fun with her. I got in Thursday and because of the rainy day, we just hung out around the house. Yesterday, I met Kim for breakfast then hung out in the afternoon before going for Chinese at a non-descript but tasty place in Carlsbad. The SD Zoo was on our radar today. Joey’s here too with Sarah (my niece). So while he was registering for the La Jolla Marathon, we checked out the Gorillas. Sage spent most of the day eyeing kneecaps from her stroller but one day she’ll appreciate the photobook of SD animals we’ll be signing to.
She’s finally asleep. We got home and though the poor thing was wasted, she was wired from all of the activity and the vibe resonating throughout my parent’s house. Joey, Sarah, Julie (my sister), my mom and dad. All present and socializing. Sage did not want to miss a moment. After dinner she played with Sarah’s Crayons and Julie took pictures of me and the baby. I was so grateful- I’ve been dying to get shots like these but I’m usually the one taking the pictures. You can see some of them at www.dropshots.com/pcskigal.
If the weather’s nice we’re going to the beach tomorrow. Both of Sage’s grandmas gave her these cute little swimsuits. Btw, we start a parent/tot swim class May 15 in Park City, after we get back from the Reno River Festival. I better get to sleep myself. I’m beat.
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